Crying in Crazy Land
I'm having a bad day today, sitting in my office crying. Why? Well who the hell knows. I actually had to leave a minute ago and spend some time in the other building, sobbing. Then I walked around the block to make sure I wasn't carrying the Dreaded Fleas into the main building.
Today I guess I'm thinking of everything I've lost. It wasn't just a breast, it wasn't just a childhood, it wasn't even innocence. It wasn't any of those individual things. I'm not sure I can even enumerate them. And, after all, what would be the point of that? Sometimes hope seems so far away I have no idea of how I'll reach it, or if I ever will. Hope for what? If I knew, I'd be working hard to get it.
It's a bad day. That's all. One of the great things that breast cancer taught me is that it's just fine to cry. Furthermore, I couldn't stop it even if I wanted to. And I really, really want to. I'm a person who just gets up every day, hoping to learn whatever lessons the universe has to teach me, and I get on with things. Buck up. Get a grip. Move on.
I'm more composed now. Thanks for listening. I am now officially bucking up. I might even have a macadamia nut or two.
posted by: rosietulips (reply)
post date: 06.06.07 (11:01 am)
Go crazy! Have three!!
Sometimes a cry feels really good. I hope your cry was cathartic, and I hope your day gets better! *patpat*
posted by: ammegan (reply)
post date: 06.06.07 (12:15 pm)
Sorry for you. HOpe everything will be well...;)
posted by: lovelikeliquid (reply)
post date: 06.06.07 (12:49 pm)
let the tears flow freely, i think its good to get it out and as of lete often find myself crying here in my own crazyland when thinking gets the bast of me.
thinking of you!
posted by: consciousphobic (reply)
post date: 06.07.07 (3:48 am)
HUGS :)
posted by: mimi (reply)
post date: 06.07.07 (3:56 am)
have a good cry...it keeps your head (or heart) from exploding
xoxoxox
posted by: doeeyed (reply)
post date: 06.07.07 (6:05 am)
(((ggirl)))
posted by: bronwynj (reply)
post date: 06.22.07 (5:11 am)
Did you know that macadamias are native to Bauple, Queensland, Australia? I grew up near Bauple. We had Bauple nut trees on our farm, & as children we used to climb the hill each year to collect the nuts from the ground under the Bauple nut tree (pronounced boppel). We'd smash each nut shell individually with a hammer on concrete, & eat the nuts one at a time. My uncle has a macadamia plantation.
